*TURN OFF YOUR LIGHTS*
(And give yourself a severe case of eyestrain)
(Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the beach....)
CCST3K’s Magical MSTery Tour Productions Presents…
"DEAD OR ALIVE: XTREME FANFIC MSTing" (A CCST3K MINI-SERIES)
EPISODE 1: MEGAMAN LEGENDS TRILOGY
(A Megaman Legends/Misadventures of Tron Bonne MSTing)
MSTed From the Desk of CardCaptor Schlueter (aka Syaoran-kun)
This is a MSTing of a work of fiction created by another author.
Use of copyrighted and trademarked material is for entertainment
purposes only; no infringement on the original copyrights or
trademarks held by Best Brains, Inc. is intended or should be inferred.
“Dead Or Alive” is the property of Tecmo: Team Ninja. Bow down before the DOA Girls, mortals!
“Megaman Legends”, “Megaman Legends 2” and “The Misadventures of Tron Bonne” are all the property of Capcom Co.
“Megaman Legends Trilogy” is the property of Ian Jenkins and he’s welcome to it.
I do not intend to offend him by making fun of his work like this but I figure it's only a matter of time before someone does.
Think of this as another form of C&C. ;)
**
KASUMI’S SUITE
ROOM 301: THE HOTEL ZACK
The
early morning light was barely just creeping through the windows of Kasumi’s
suite when there was a knock at the door. Kasumi sat up, bleary eyed and barely
conscious as she managed to get up, put on a robe and answer the door. The
bellhop handed her a message which she accepted and then closed the door. The
bellhop didn’t get a tip, but seeing Kasumi in her negligee and robe made him
forget all about it.
Kasumi
ran her hand through her long auburn locks as she read the massage:
You are
cordially invited to a private screening of a new feature film in the theater
this morning at
-Zack
Kasumi
stared blankly at the message for a few moments. She hadn’t heard anything
about a film screening before. She glanced at the alarm clock. It was only nine-thirty
right now. She shrugged and tossed the message on her nightstand before heading
to the bathroom to shower and get dressed.
**
THE HOTEL LOBBY
A
little over an hour later, Kasumi had finished and was headed for the hotel
theater. Since she had a volleyball match that
afternoon she had prepared in advance by putting on her pink asterope bikini with
a red sarong around her waist to make herself look at least a bit more
conservative. She wasn’t sure she was really in the mood to see a movie, but
she had nothing to do that morning so she decided to go anyway.
“You
seem well this morning,” said a bemused voice from behind her. “Sleep well?”
Kasumi
recognized the voice immediately. She turned to see Ayane standing just a few
feet away with her hands on her hips and a smirk on her face. Kasumi scowled at
her lavender haired half sister. Kasumi wondered why she had to be teamed with
Ayane for today’s match. It was ironic and not in a good way. Ayane had also
apparently decided to be prepared in advance as she was wearing a pair of cut
off shorts and a blue tank top over her purple amethyst bikini.
“What’s
the matter, sis?” Ayane said with a sardonic grin. “Aren’t you happy to see me?”
“Don’t
tell me you’re going to be at the screening too,” said Kasumi crossing her
arms.
“As
a matter of fact, I am,” Ayane replied. “Why are you afraid your big, bad sister
is going to hurt you?”
“You
wish!” Kasumi retorted with a scowl.
“Oh?”
said Ayane. “If you’re not scared…” she began as she yanked off Kasumi’s sarong
causing the ninja girl to let out a startled cry. “Why are you wearing *that*?”
Ayane pointed to the kodachi strapped to Kasumi’s left thigh.
“It’s
a force of habit,” said Kasumi as she grabbed the sarong back and tied it
around her waist. “I wonder who else is going to be there…”
Ayane
shrugged and they both headed into the theater.
**
THE THEATER
Leifang,
Helena and Hitomi were already seated as Kasumi and Ayane entered the theater.
The trio had been on the beach just a few minutes earlier and
were still in their swimsuits. Hitomi was wearing her red and white
flora bikini and was busy drying her hair with a towel,
“Morning,
Kasumi!” called a cheerful Leifang as she turned to see the newcomers.
“Good
morning, Leifang,” Kasumi replied with a smile.
“Anybody
have any idea what this is all about?” Hitomi asked as Kasumi and Ayane sat
down.
“Not
me,” said
“Where
are Christie, Lisa and Tina?” Leifang asked. “Didn’t they get invited?”
“Like
I care…” Ayane muttered. “Hey, sis… Who are we playing against today?”
Kasumi
blinked. “I don’t know,” she replied.
“It’s
not me,” said Hitomi.
“Me
neither,”
Just
then, the theater screen lit up to reveal Christie, Lisa and Tina standing in
what looked like a security control room. “Good morning everyone,” said
Christie. A loud series of bangs exhoed through the theater as the doors
slammed shut and locked.
“Oh
lovely…” growled Ayane. “If this film is about them then I can understand why
they didn’t tell us what the show was today.”
“Hey!”
Tina retorted but was silenced by a gesture from Christie.
“Very
amusing, Ayane,” said Christie. “Our host has recently felt somewhat maligned
by you ladies.”
“He
should feel maligned,” said Hitomi. “Damn fool keeps trying to grope me… Lousy
Dennis Rodman clone…”
“Well,
he thought that shoving him in the pool was a bit much,” said Lisa.
“It
was self-defense!” Leifang protested.
“Well,
did you have to drop the rock on him while he was underwater?” asked Lisa. “Anyway,
he decided to punish you by making you read some internet fanfiction crap.”
“Hey!”
“Well,”
said Christie. “Zack likes Tina too much to put her through that.”
“And
you two?” asked Kasumi.
“Are
here to keep the bimbo from pressing the buttons on the control panels,”
Christie replied.
“HEY!!”
said Tina.
“Zack
does realize that by doing this I *will* be forced to rip out his guts and
strangle him with them, right?” said Ayane darkly.
Lisa
and Tina just stared blankly for a moment but Christie seemed unmoved. “That’s
not very nice…” said Tina.
“Well,
either way, we have for you something called ‘Megaman Legends Trilogy’,” said
Christie. “Enjoy the show, girls!” And the image disappeared.
Ayane
began muttering curses under her breath as the story began:
**
>(Megaman, Roll, the Bonnes, etc., are all property of
Capcom. They aren't my characters. Don't sue me. I probably made any people
you’ve never heard of >before. Enjoy.)
Hitomi: He’s made people?
Ayane: It can’t be that hard.
Someone made Kasumi Alpha, right?
Kasumi: Don’t remind me.
>Megaman Legends Trilogy
>Episode One: Desperate
Leifang: Geez… Not *another*
Mortal Kombat sequel!
Kasumi:<Kitana> I never should have signed that damn ten
year contract.
>By Ian Jenkins
>
>Email: Kronosreckeryahoo.com
Hitomi: That isn’t even a real
e-mail!
Ayane: Well, this guy is off to a
great start.
>"Do you have any idea why you are here, my dear...?" Glyde's
voice echoed throughout the chamber,
Leifang: I’m going to go out on a
limb and say a chamber.
Ayane:<Glyde> Now… Where did Tom Riddle hide that damn
basilisk?
>"Ah... wait. I forgot!
You're gagged... shut up like you should be... meddlesome brat!" he spat out
as he slapped Tron across the face.
Kasumi:<Glyde a la William Shatner> I am... now… Evil… Kirk!
>Unfortunately, she was not
able to fight back. She had been chained to the wall, a gag in her mouth and
tear-streaks down her beautiful face.
Ayane: Woah! Hey! What the hell
kinda fanfic is this?!
Hitomi: Glyde’s gotta cut back on
the hentai anime.
Kasumi:<Lemina Ausa> You just like having girls tied up, you
pervert!!
>Tron winced as Glyde struck her not once, not twice but a total of six
times.
Leifang: Not that this would come
back to haunt him later. Nope. No chance.
Kasumi:<Glyde> Bring out the Gimp!
>A normal looting of a town
turned out to be more than she expected as Glyde had come in, quick and brutal,
totaling her new Gustaff and kidnapping her.
Ayane:<snorts> Yeah. I’m buying *this*. Glyde couldn’t beat
eggs.
>His Birdbots had dealt with
the Servbots quickly before any of them could report back to Teisel Bonne what
had happened.
Hitomi: …in a battle scene too
goofy to show.
Leifang: Chibi-Robot Wars! Live on
HBO!
>Now she was locked up somewhere
but she could tell it was Glyde's base. She knew that his base on Carlbina had
been destroyed but she wasn't aware of any >of his other bases.
Ayane: Oh, great… Now he’s Dr.
Wily.
Kasumi:<Glyde> Well, I’m certain nothing will happen to
*this* base. Nope. Nosiree.
Leifang: This smells like a setup
for a Bob and George comic.
>"Keh-keh-keh!" a Birdbot ran in, screaming, "Incoming
transmission! It's from the Gesselchaft II!"
Hitomi: I wonder what happened to
the Gesselchaft I. Must’ve been built after the *Gesselshaft*.
Leifang: Who named these things?
Asuka Langley Sohryu?
>Glyde smiled. So, her big brother had come, at last.
Kasumi:<Glyde> I knew he was watching.
>He lowered the screen down and
turned it on. The image of Teisel Bonne, with Bon Bonne standing in the back,
appeared slowly... and he didn't look too happy.
>Glyde folded his arms,
"Teisel, Teisel, Teisel... how nice you could
call."
Hitomi:<Teisel> Well, I switched long distance companies
recently…
>"Shut up, Glyde!" Teisel retorted, angrily, "Why have you
taken Tron!?"
Ayane:<Glyde> To provide a plot for this fanfic, of course.
>Glyde sneered at Teisel, "Please... did you honestly think what I said
in Yosyonke was an empty threat? I told you I'd get you for nearly having me
killed! I think >killing your dear sister would suffice."
Leifang: Uma Thurman *IS* Glyde in
“Kill Bonne: Vol. 1”!
Kasumi:<Glyde> If I really wanted to get even I’d have to
kill you and your siblings and all your little servbots. That’d just about make
us square.
>Teisel suddenly went wide-eyed, "You wouldn't DARE! Do you know what I
would do if you did!?"
Hitomi:<Teisel> ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Tron’s the only one who
can work these damn machines! I have no idea what these buttons all do!
>Glyde laughed, "What are you going to do, Teisel? Call the police and
tell them that infamous air pirate Teisel Bonne's sister has been kidnapped?
Half the known >police forces in the world are on the Loath family payrolls,
anyway. Besides, you bring your Gesselchaft anywhere near
Leifang:<Glyde> Goddammit!
>Now Teisel was angry... REALLY angry,
Kasumi:<Teisel> Don’t make me angry. You wouldn’t like me
when I’m angry.
>"What the hell do you
want from me, Glyde!?"
Ayane:<Glyde> That’s a good place to start.
>"Somehow, you managed to scrape up enough parts... and money... to
make yourselves another Gesselchaft." Glyde grinned a tad sadistically,
Leifang: Big deal. Star Fleet
managed to do it five times with the
>"Everything you have...
the money... the possessions... and the Gesselchaft II. You give me all this, and I let your sister go."
Hitomi: Of course, once they give
him everything they own, they won’t be able to leave Glyde’s base which means…
he hasn’t thought this through very well.
Kasumi: But he just said that if
they bring the Gesselchaft anywhere near the island… ARGHH!! This makes no
sense!!
>By this time, Teisel was going completely nuts.
Leifang: How this is different
from how Teisel usually is… Well, we don’t know.
>EVERYTHING they owned? He
clenched his fist, "Glyde, have you lost your MIND???"
Kasumi: …said the pot to the kettle.
>"No." Glyde merely chuckled, "I am
testing you to see how much family loyalty you have."
>With that he backed away from
the screen, turned to Tron and slapped her again... HARD.
Kasumi:<Lucia of the Blue Star> Pain…
Hitomi: Damn… The difficulty
setting on this fanfic is stuck.
Ayane: Tron Bonne will now be
played by Anthy Himemiya.
>The gag in her mouth muffled
her loud cry but any idiot could tell she was in pain. Glyde laughed again and
drew a pistol of sorts, aiming it at Tron's temple.
Ayane: Not that kind of temple,
blondie.
Ayane: You want a piece of me,
opera girl?!
Kasumi: A pistol of sorts? So what
sort is it?
>Glancing over at the screen,
he grinned at Teisel who was in shock, "Guess your loyalty to family isn't
as powerful as I thought." He jammed the gun into her >temple and she
cried aloud.
Hitomi: Even though she was gagged
one sentence ago.
Leifang: Continuity!
>"WAIT!" Teisel screamed.
>Glyde stopped, looking down,
the smile still on his lips. He knew he'd crack. Looking up to the screen, he
spoke, "Made a decision, have you?"
Ayane:<Teisel> Yes. I’ll have the red wine with the
chicken.
Kasumi:<Glyde> God, you’re a dork.
>Teisel sighed, looking down, "All right, Glyde... it's all
yours."
Hitomi:<Glyde> Really?
Leifang:<Teisel> No.
>"Excellent... in four days, rendezvous with me on
Ayane:
>"How do I know you'll keep your word?"
>
>"Only that if you bring anything other than your possessions, I'll
kill your sister myself." Glyde sneered, "
Kasumi:<Glyde> All your possessions that can’t be used as
weapons or in any way can be used to threaten me.
Leifang:<Teisel> So you want what? My
bottlecap collection?
Kasumi:<Glyde> No! Those edges are dangerous!
>With that he turned off the
screen.
Hitomi: Glyde did his karaoke of
“I’m Too Sexy”, which would turn anyone off.
>Teisel sighed as the screen turned blank. One of the Servbots slowly walked
up to him, "Wh-what are we going to do about Miss
Tron, Mister Teisel?"
>
>"We don't really have a choice." Teisel sat down, "We're
going to have to-"
>
>"Babu! Babu-Babu Babu!" Bon spoke...
sorta.
Ayane: He knows morse
code.
>Teisel turned to look at him, "You have an idea? Well, don't just stand
there, boy! Speak up!"
>
>"Babu-babu-babu-babu Babu! Babubu!"
Bon was almost jumping up and down in what seemed to be excitement.
Kasumi:<Teisel> Timmy fell down a well?
Ayane: Seriously, what the hell
*is* Bon anyway? Is he a robot or what?
>A smile slowly crept across Teisel's face, "You mean... she LIKES
him???" He laughed, "You're a genius, Bon! #15! Get a hold of the
Flutter! I think it's about >time we asked the blue boy for a little
favor."
Leifang:<heavy sarcasm> Yeah. He needs to repay you for all
those attempts you made on his life.
Hitomi:<Teisel> Forget our giant flying war machine! Get me
that decrepit piece of junk that Roll pilots!
>"You have lost your mind, Teisel Bonne, you
have lost your mind." Megaman rubbed his face as he listened to Teisel on
the comm, "Glyde kidnapped Tron and >now you want me to help you get
her back?"
Kasumi:<Colin Mochrie> Nice segue.
Ayane:<Teisel> That’s the basic plot of the story, yes.
Leifang: I think Megaman is being
presumptuous by assuming Teisel *had* a mind to lose.
>"Yes!" Teisel's panicked voice swept
through the Flutter's cockpit,
>"I wouldn't be calling
YOU if I wasn't desperate! I can't call the police and you're the only other
one I know who can get the job done!"
>
>"Give me a very good reason why I should help you and I'll be the
judge." Megaman said, his voice cold.
Ayane:<Megaman> I left it in the freezer last night.
Hitomi:<Megaman> How do you like my Sub-Zero impression?
Leifang:<Teisel> You sound more like Kula Diamond.
Hitomi:<Megaman> Even better!
Ayane: Oh great… Now I have the
image of Megaman in a purple leather bodysuit in my brain.
>"I've been told that she likes you and-"
>
>Megaman sighed, "That doesn't matter."
Leifang:<Teisel> You don’t care that she might reward you
with sex?
Kasumi:<Megaman> Whoa… Now that’s a different matter.
Ayane: That’s when Roll’s wrench
became intimately acquainted with Megaman’s skull.
>Teisel was getting angry, "Oh, it doesn't, Megaman? Don't try and play
the innocent fool. I saw your face in that warehouse on Kattelox. I know that
somewhere >beneath your squeaky-clean blue armor... you like her too. If she
is killed, you won't be able to forgive yourself. So please... help my
sister!"
Hitomi: Somehow the concept of
“Gee… I’m glad your not dead” never seemed like much of a romantic confession
to me.
Leifang: Plus he’s blown up a lot
of Tron’s war machines while she was still in them which seems
to suggest he’s kind of indifferent to Tron.
>Megaman was silent as Roll looked on. She didn't like dealing with the
Bonnes... especially Tron.
Kasumi: Oh great… It’s the old Betty
and Veronica routine.
>But this would be Megaman's
idea. She knew he was going to say yes and wasn't the least bit surprised when
he did.
Leifang:<Roll> I am not the least bit surprised.
Ayane:<Roll> It’s the same thing day in and day out with
him. Same breakfast, same conversation, same wild sex in the engine room…
>Teisel smiled, "Thank you, Megaman! Listen carefully, now. Glyde told
me that he didn't want the Gesselchaft II anywhere near
Hitomi:<Megaman> Wow! He’s even lamer than you!
Leifang: How he’s supposed to *hand
over* the Gesselchaft to Glyde as he demanded is still to be determined.
>Roll checked up on
Kasumi:<Roll> Hey! They’re holding a beach volleyball
tournament there! When this is all over Tron and I can be a team! We’ll get our
bikinis… It’ll be fun!
>"
Ayane:<Roll> What, with that damned flying echidna guarding
the place.
Hitomi: Oddly,
>"Unless." Teisel was musing,
"Unless he's holed up in one of the buildings."
>
>Megaman rubbed his chin and nodded, "That's a good assumption."
>Teisel smiled, "Thank you. I have a contact on
>
>"Can we trust him?" Megaman asked, quirking an eyebrow.
Hitomi:<Megaman> Fascinating…
Leifang: He’s being quirky! Ha!
Ayane: Don’t make me hurt you.
>"As much as you can trust me." Teisel
said, simply.
>
>Megaman and Roll both blinked for a few moments. Roll shook her head,
"That doesn't give us much confidence."
Ayane:<Teisel> Of course it doesn’t, you tools! That’s the
joke!
Leifang and Kasumi:<Roll
and Megaman> Oh.
>"Sue me."
Hitomi:<Megaman> If you insist…
>Megaman rubbed at his face,
Kasumi: He’s doing a lot of that
lately.
>"Roll,
set course for
>
>"Thanks again, Megaman! Good luck!" With that, the comm
was silent.
Leifang:<Roll> Damn! I forgot to pay the phone bill this month!
>Roll stared ahead as she piloted the Flutter. She wasn't exactly thrilled
with the fact that Megaman was getting himself involved with the Bonnes again.
But, she >couldn't say that to him. She merely stayed silent as she
continued onward towards Tannic. Megaman headed out of the cockpit, probably to
his room, to >prepare.
Kasumi: Say… Where’s Roll’s
grandfather? You know, the aged decrepit
Hitomi: I think he’s gone to that
great dig in the sky.
>As Megaman entered his room, his faithful dancing monkey, Data, was
following, doing his dance as he went.
Ayane: Someone please *kill* that
damned thing.
>Megaman sat down on his bed,
staring at the floor. Data bounced up to him and spoke, "Ki-ki! Megaman!
Why so down?"
Leifang:<Data> Nah. That can’t be it.
>Megaman shook his head, "It's this upcoming mission. I think... I
think Teisel is right."
>
>"About Glyde's location?"
>
>"No." Megaman sighed, "I think I like Tron."
Kasumi:<Megaman> I mean, sure, the special effects are dated
and the plot is screwy, but all in all it’s not a bad film.
Ayane:<Data> I think you’ve taken one too many shots to the
head, kid.
>Data jumped up so far, it was as if he was going to go through the ceiling.
Megaman caught him quickly but Data stopped his dance, "You LIKE
her?"
>
>"Shhhh." Megaman set him down and put a finger to his
mouth, "Keep it down, will ya? Yeah, I do. So
what?"
Leifang:<Data> But she already has a date for the prom!
Hitomi:<Megaman> Maybe if I pass her a note in study hall…
>Data started doing his dance again but wasn't too happy. It was a rapid
dance, a dance of anger,
Kasumi:<Data> Kupo!
>"She tried to kill you
numerous times, and she lied to you!"
Leifang:<Data> The murder attempts are one thing, but she
LIES LIKE A RUG!!
Ayane:<smirks> What can I say? Bad girls get all the guys.
>"...She helped me on more than one occasion, too." Megaman
retorted, "Getting me home, for example?"
Hitomi: That was because she was
the designated driver and you had had a few too many, Megaman.
Kasumi:<Megaman, drunk> Heeeeeyyyy, Troooooonnn… You know
you’re pretty shexy wheeeennn you’re mad. <hic>
>Data was silent but shook his little head, sighing, "I hope you know
what you're getting into, Megaman." With that, he danced his way out of
the room.
Ayane: He’s practicing for a Dance
Dance Revolution war with Tea Gardener.
Leifang:<CardCaptor Schlueter> Tea-saaaamaaaa!! ^-^
Hitomi: He needs help.
>Megaman watched him and sat back down on the bed, "So do I."
>
>Glyde grinned to himself.
All: GAH!!
Leifang: Don’t DO that!
>Teisel would come through and
give him everything the Bonne family owned. Once that was done, he could finish
them off easily. Without the Servbots to aid them >and without Tron's
machines to fight with, all they had was their little brother, that annoying
Bon.
Hitomi: But you *ordered* them not
to bring their weapons!! How can they--- ARGHHHHHH!! I
give up! This crap makes no sense!
>He slowly walked up to Tron and removed her gag. Taking a rose and gliding
it down her cheek, he smiled, "My dear... your brother has opted to lose
everything >in exchange for you. How brave is that?"
Ayane: So… immediate surrender is
brave now?
Leifang: I guess that makes us all
cowards.
>Tron glared at him, "You'll get yours for this, Glyde!"
Kasumi:<Tron> You and your little dog too!
>Glyde laughed. He had heard this all before from Tron and her brother. The
only problem was that she had gone through on her word.
Hitomi:<Tron> WOLF!! RUN!! Ha, ha! Fooled you!
>Ross Loath was imprisoned, he
was now on the run from the other half of the police forces that WEREN'T on his
payroll, and his Birdbot forces were at an all->time low.
Kasumi: So he’s decided that now
would be a good time to stage a kidnapping plot against his enemies.
>However, he thought that the
fact that
Leifang: So this island is
inhabited primarily by people who have no problem with harboring a fugitive and
being accessories to kidnapping and murder?
>"Tron, do you have any idea how painful it was back on Yosyonke?"
he asked rhetorically, turning his back to her while two other men stood by
watching, with >machine guns in their arms, standing guard over the air
pirate.
>"Oh, please." she
rolled her eyes, "I went through the same thing."
Ayane:<Tron> Geez… You’re such a baby.
Hitomi: So all the men in these
games are the wusses?
>Glyde shook his head, "You haven't been betrayed before." He
turned to face her again, "Or maybe you have. Either
way, we had a deal and you didn't come >through."
Leifang:<Tron> I’m EVIL, you knob! What did you expect?!
>"So, you're taking everything we have. There's your payment!"
Kasumi:<Glyde> I don’t take CODs.
>"Oh, no, no, no." Glyde shook his head
and sauntering back over to Tron, slowly, "You didn't come through on your
part of the bargain so... I won't come through >with mine."
>Tron's eyes widened, "You don't mean.?"
>
>"Once I have everything from your brothers." Glyde moved in for
the coup de grace, "You will die."
Ayane:<Glyde> You DIE, Joe!
>Tron was angry and scared at the same time, spitting on Glyde's face. Glyde
simply smiled at her, that sick and demented smile.
Hitomi:<Glyde a la Xellos> Could you do that again but
harder?
>As Tron stared into his eyes,
her own began to well up with tears.
Kasumi:<Tron> Dear GOD! Glyde, when was the last time you
bathed?!
>"You're scared, aren't you.?" Glyde
whispered, "You should be. I'm not sure how your parents died, Tron but...
you can be sure you'll be seeing them soon in >Hell."
Leifang: Glyde learned villainous
dialogue from chop-socky movies, I see.
><Oh, God.> Tron's mind screamed, <HELP ME! Teisel! Bon! Anybody...
please... help me...>
Ayane:<Tron> Shut up, mind!
Kasumi:<Tron’s mind> Help me, Rhonda! Help, help me,
Rhonda!!
>"Megaman, we're approaching
All: GAH!!
Hitomi:<Glyde> Hey! My scene wasn’t done yet!!
Leifang:<Roll> Please return your seats to the upright and
locked positions.
>Megaman opened one eye
sleepily, still in the sitting position from when Data had left him.
>
>"Guess I was more tired
than I thought." he yawned as he stood up, albeit he was a bit shaky.
Exiting his room, he entered the cockpit and leaned against the wall.
Ayane: That’ll lead to back
problems, friends.
>Roll glanced back at him, "Hey, Megaman... are you all right? You look
exhausted."
Leifang:<Megaman> Well, we didn’t get much sleep last night,
remember?
Ayane: I don’t know you two.
>"Yeah, I'm all right." Megaman nodded, "Any contact?"
>
>"No, not-" Roll began.
>
>"Unidentified ship! Halt now!" a voice suddenly came on
the comm.
Hitomi:<voice> And watch out for snakes!
>"Wha...?" Megaman quirked an eyebrow, "Who is this?"
Kasumi:<voice> Someone who’s sick of your quirkiness, blue
boy!
Ayane:<Megaman> A Megaman Legends fanfic written by PJ?
Leifang: No. That’s *Roll’s* worst
nightmare.
>"Prepare to be boarded! If you don't surrender, you'll be fired
upon!" the voice snapped.
Hitomi: CRACK!
Kasumi:<voice> My spine!!
>"No, you dolt!" Teisel's voice rang on
the other line, "THESE are the ones that are going to help us!"
>
>Megaman and Roll slowly turned to look at each other.
Kasumi:<Roll> What the HELL have you gotten us into?!
Leifang:<Megaman> I’m all for leaving right about now.
>"They are?" the first voice asked, "Oh... whoops... boy, is
my face red."
>
>"It WILL be red in a minute!" Teisel snapped. Upon clearing his
throat, Teisel addressed the Flutter, "Sorry about this, Megaman, he's a
bit too energetic about his >job."
>"That's all right." Megaman replied, "Do we have clearance
to land?"
>
>"Yes. Just pull up to that big crane there." Teisel
instructed.
Hitomi:<Teisel> The white zone is for loading and unloading
only.
>Roll did as she was instructed, maneuvering the Flutter towards the crane
that looked to pull down into a large warehouse. As the airship passed by the
crane, the >crane jumped to life, grabbed the Flutter quickly, and brought
it into the warehouse. Megaman and Roll were both tumbled about by the
suddenness of it all. >Megaman landed on his back and Roll right on top of
him. Cozy, hm?
Leifang: Looks like Megaman wants a
*Roll* in the hay! Ha!
Ayane: One more pun
like that and I’ll break your face.
>"Oh, and by the way." Teisel's voice
came back, "I hope you have seatbelts. It'll be a tad bumpy."
>
>"THANK you, Teisel." Megaman retorted through clenched
teeth.
Hitomi:<Megaman> …ya big tool.
>Roll blushed and stood, "Sorry."
Leifang:<Megaman> Don’t be!
>Megaman shook his head and slowly got to his feet, "Have we
stopped?"
>
>Looking out the window, Roll nodded, "Yes. It's looks like we're in
that warehouse."
Kasumi: An abandoned warehouse?!
What the--?! What the hell kind of budget did they film this on?!
>Megaman cracked his metallic knuckles, "All right, then. Looks like we're in business. I'll go out and try to find
Teisel and get this overwith. I'll be back."
Leifang:<Gary Shandling> Okay. Fifteen minutes just past…
Ayane:<Megaman> I’m back now. Teisel and the others are
dead.
Hitomi:<Roll> I thought we were here to help them.
Ayane:<Megaman> Yeah. But this way was so much easier. So
you wanna get lunch?
>Without another word, Megaman dashed out of the cockpit and to the door,
opening it and taking his first few steps out of the Flutter... and crashing
down to the >ground.
Kasumi:<Roll> Remind me why I’m supposed to be in love with
him again.
Ayane: It’s Bob and George version
Megaman!
>"THIS is Megaman Volnutt???" a voice asked, sounding like the one
from the comm who had threatened to fire on the Flutter.
Leifang:<Servbot> Can I just hurl myself out the window now,
sir?
>"Megaman, can you hear me?" Teisel's voice sounded with a sigh,
"Next time, you might wanna wait AFTER we've put the stairs up to reach
your ship's door."
>
>"Ugh." Megaman slowly opened his eyes, "That
hurt."
Ayane: I had to teach
>"Get up from there and let's get to work." Teisel grumbled. Megaman
got to his feet and shook the cobwebs from his head. He glanced at the person
standing next >to Teisel. He looked about 16, unshaven, brown hair.
Kasumi:<person> Hi there,
I’m Mr. Generic Teen. Nice to meet you. Say, what do you think of this neat red
shirt I just got?
>Teisel put a hand on the kid's shoulder, "Megaman, I would like you to
meet Aurin Esling. He's my contact that'll get us into
Hitomi: Translation: He’s my
travel agent.
>Aurin nodded and bowed slightly in respect, "Megaman Volnutt... a true
pleasure." A grin formed on his face as he glanced up to Teisel,
"THIS is the guy who >beat the living hell out of you???" A huge
chorus of laughs by the kid and some of the others around followed this
comment. Teisel's response was to grab Aurin >by the scruff of his shirt and
hoisting him up to eye level.
>
>"You bring that up
again." Teisel growled in a threatening voice, "...and I'll rip out
your vocal chords."
Leifang: Hey! Lighten up, Teisel.
The kid knows a good joke when he sees one.
Ayane: I guess Tron and Roll exist
to give this series an air of competence.
>Megaman rubbed his throat, wincing slightly.
Kasumi:<Megaman, raspy>
Anybody got any antiseptic spray?
>Aurin immediately stopped
laughing and Teisel dropped him. Regaining his footing, he stood at attention,
"Uh, right. If you two gentlemen will follow me, I will >show you to
the meeting room."
>
>Aurin, turning on his heels, retreated to a nearby card table set up a few
feet away, sitting in a chair and surrounded by the 40 Servbots (Kobuns) and
Bon Bonne. >Megaman blinked, "Nice meeting room... a chair and a card
table?"
Hitomi:<Teisel> Well,
*someone* blew it on a trip to Vegas.
Leifang:<Aurin> Look… I said
I was sorry!
>Aurin shrugged, "Best I could do on my salary." He glared at
Teisel at the end of that little comment, who silenced him with a look of his
own.
Kasumi: Uh-oh… Staring contest!
>Wiping sweat from his brow, Aurin nodded, "S-so, anyway, you two need
to get to
>
>"Glyde." Megaman replied.
Ayane: Well, this Aurin guy seems
*wonderfully* well informed of the situation.
Leifang: This operation’s trying
its hands at all kinds of incompetence.
>"Yeah, whatever." Aurin shrugged, "Now,
Hitomi: I guess “Legends” is
quickly becoming the “Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle” of Megaman.
Leifang:<CardCaptor
Schlueter> SPEAK
Ayane: You’ve got to stop
channeling that guy.
Leifang: Damn… I wish I could.
>When Loath was captured,
SigmaCorp disavowed any knowledge of being a part of the Loath Corporation,
Kasumi:<SigmaCorp Recording>
Should any of our employees be captured or killed, the secretary will disavow
any knowledge of your actions.
>while they still continued
doing illegal operations for the Loath Corporation. They built up enough money
to get Glyde out of prison. Glyde took over the entire >corporation and
never released Lex Loath himself. I believe that Glyde is holding Tron hostage
in the SigmaCorp Headquarters, in the Center of Kazakh Island."
Ayane:<rolling her eyes>
Where else?
>Teisel rubbed his chin, "And how do you propose we get into SigmaCorp?
That place is a skyscraper!"
>"A water insertion is out of the question." Aurin shook his head.
Hitomi:<Aurin> Mostly
because I have no clue what the hell I mean by that.
>"Is there any kind of airship that won't be recognized by Glyde's
forces?" Megaman asked.
Leifang: We’re hovering very close
to a Final Fantasy crossover at this minute.
>"Possibly." Teisel's eyebrows arched, "Aurin here is a spy.
He's gotten his hands on a nice little cargo airship that he recovered after
one of Loath's operations. It's >got the SigmaCorp insignia and
everything!"
Kasumi: Hey! This is the Rebel
infiltration plot from “Return of the Jedi”!
>"Hey!' Aurin yelped, "Don't volunteer my equipment. I love that
thing."
Hitomi: Ick…
>"You'll pay for it in spades if you don't let us use it." Teisel
glared at him.
Leifang: Oh… It’s a bridge game?
Kasumi:<Aurin> But I don’t
have that many shovels!
>Aurin, coward he was, rubbed the back of his neck, grumbling, "Fine,
but, if it's destroyed, I want compensation, OK???"
>
>"You owe me money anyway!" Teisel flared, "You're lucky
you're not in our new and improved torture room!"
Leifang: Tron had it installed for
disciplining Servbots, interrogating prisoners and recreational purposes.
Ayane:<Tron> CALL ME QUEEN!!
OHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!! <makes whip cracking sound>
Kasumi:<victim> Yes…
Mistress…
>Megaman blinked at the two. He was trying hard to remind himself just why
he was doing this: to help rescue Tron. To get to her, he was pretty much
willing to >put up with anything that came his path.
Hitomi: And Megaman knows that to
conduct a rescue, sometimes you have to work with a lot of tools.
>"Guys, guys, let's calm down here." He said, putting his hands
up, "Let's not try and forget why we're here, all right? Tron's in big
trouble if we don't get her out of >there!"
>Aurin turned to Megaman and nodded, "Uh, right. Let's go over the
detailed plans."
Kasumi: Oh, the *detailed* plans.
So Aurin is Jim Phelps now?
Leifang:<hums the
Hitomi:<Peter Graves> First I get replaced by Jon Voight and
now this… I’m going to beat Tom Cruise senseless.
>Tron opened her eyes groggily. A slight nap, courtesy of one of Glyde's
torture devices, also known as a cattle prod, had been what she need.
Ayane:<Glyde> Yes. I’ll just
JAB THE HEROINE with this LETHAL DEVICE because there’s NO WAY this is going to
come back and bite me in the ass later.
Kasumi: Chill, sis, it’s just a
fanfic.
>However, she found herself
with another problem, "Ugh... my head."
>
>"Keh-keh-keh-keh-keh!" A Birdbot cackled, "Oh, good! You're
awake! Glyde's got some great news for you... well, actually... it's NOT so
good for you! Keh->keh-keh!"
>
>"Oh, really?" Tron growled, "So, what else is new?"
>"It's simply this, my dear." Glyde smiled as he strode in from
another room, "I was just contacted by one of your more... disliked
enemies. This one has told me >that your brothers and Megaman are coming to
try and save you."
Ayane:<dryly> Gee… I wonder
*who* in this story could have *possibly* decided to sell Tron up the river.
Hmmmmm… Let me *think*!
Kasumi: Enough already…
>Tron widened her eyes, "Megaman??"
>
>"Yes, indeed." Glyde nodded, "But rather than just kill you
now, I'll just use you as a bargaining chip in the long run of things. Besides,
I'd like to show you more of >my devices... quite effective, aren't
they?"
Hitomi: I don’t even want to
*think* about where he’s going with this.
><He should have killed me...> Tron thought, <That's the last
mistake he'll make.>
Leifang: I dunno. I think Glyde’s
going to make a lot more mistakes before this thing ends.
>"But... who was it? Who told you about the attack?" she asked,
her brows furrowing.
Kasumi:<Glyde> Hey! Who’s
the prisoner and whose the captor here?
Ayane:<Tron> Shut up and
answer the damned question before I rip your balls off, Glyde.
Kasumi:<Glyde, terrified>
Yes, ma’am!
>Glyde smiled and bent down, putting his mouth near her ear and whispering
the name of Tron's enemy. As soon as Tron heard the name, her eyes were as wide
as >dinner plates, a loud gasp escaping her mouth.
>"It's-" she began but Glyde stuffed her gag back in.
>
>"Yes. That's exactly who
it is." Glyde shrugged, "Things are going to get interesting from
here on in. Don't do anything stupid, I advise you."
Ayane: Ian… Quit pretending. We
all know who the traitor is.
>He stroked her cheek with his rose again, "I wouldn't want to see you
dead before the end comes, my dear Tron."
Leifang:<Glyde> Yes, I
wouldn’t want to see you dead before you die, Tron. <pause> Wait a sec…
>Tron shook her head. That name... it was sticking in her head. She was
incredulous. First, she was ecstatic to hear that Megaman was going to be
coming to get >her out of this bind. However, that sweet, sweet taste of
triumph turned bittersweet in her mouth upon hearing the name of the enemy.
Hitomi: Or maybe it’s just that
that rag in her mouth really needed washing.
><Megaman, please...> she thought, <Come quickly...>
Ayane: Funny… That’s usually what
the *guy* says…
>(Megaman, Roll, the Bonnes, etc.,
are all property of Capcom. They aren't my characters. Don't sue me. I probably
made any people you’ve never heard of >before. Enjoy.)
Kasumi: If that’s at all possible.
>Megaman Legends Trilogy
Ayane: …was better than Ultimate
Megaman Legends 3, not that anyone really cared at that point.
>Episode Two: Tron's Liberation
Leifang:<Tron> Give me
liberty or at least a decent plot!
>By Ian Jenkins
>
>Email: Kronosreckeryahoo.com
Hitomi: It’s still not a real
e-mail, Ian.
>"If you two can land on the roof of SigmaCorp." Aurin began,
wiping sweat from his brow, "You can make your way down. More than likely,
they'll be keeping >her up near the 50th floor. That's where the security
center and interrogation area is located. And, I'm pretty positive, that it'll
be very well guarded."
Kasumi:<Aurin> Just like in
the Shinra Build--Oh, wait…
>Megaman looked at the crude map that Esling was providing. It pretty much
showed the landing pad on the roof, on the 55th going down to the 45th floor.
Ayane:<Megaman> Why is this
drawn in crayon?
>"What if she's NOT?" Megaman asked, "We can't sneak through
every single floor undetected."
Leifang: So far I’ll be surprised
if they can sneak through *one* floor undetected.
>"She'll be there. I'm almost positive." Aurin replied
confidently.
Hitomi:<Aurin> I’m
absolutely sorta pretty sure about this!
>"How do you KNOW?" Teisel eyed Aurin suspiciously.
>
>Aurin gulped, "I was there undercover! YOU sent me in before,
remember? I know what's on each and every floor. Where else would she be?"
Kasumi: So Teisel hires this guy
to create a rescue plan and is *surprised* that he might actually know
something about the place they’re breaking into?
Leifang:<Teisel> Look… We *tried* to get B. Jenet, but SNK is
still pissed about getting second billing in the Vs.
games.
.
>Teisel grunted and was silent. Aurin cracked his knuckles and went on,
"Anyways, that's about it. Any questions?"
Ayane:<Ben Stein> Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
>The two were silent. Aurin nodded, "Excellent. Then get moving. Tron
needs us now and we can't do anything just standing here." Gesturing down
the hall, he >spoke again, "The cargo ship is that way. Good luck."
With that, he turned to walk away. Megaman grabbed his arm.
>
>"Wait just a minute here!" Megaman glared at Aurin, "Where
do you think you're going???"
>"I'll be monitoring your progress from here!" the kid grinned,
"I'm not stupid enough to try this, you numbskulls. That place is packed
with Glyde's loyalists. You're >both numbskulls to try and get her. Better
to just give up all your possessions."
Hitomi:<Linda Blair> It’s not that easy I’m afraid.
>Teisel grabbed him, "Don't EVER say that again! Do you know how long
it took me to restore all this?"
Leifang:<Aurin> How long it took *you*?
Kasumi:<Teisel> Okay, do you know how long it took *Tron* to
restore all this?
>"Is your money worth more than your sister's life, Teisel?" Aurin
asked, harshly.
>
>"Please! Mister Teisel! Mister Esling! Stop fighting!" a
high-pitched voice suddenly shouted. The three looked down at their feet to see
one of the Servbots >looking back up at them with big eyes.
>"#40..." Teisel began.
>
>"Miss Tron needs our help!" the Servbot wailed, "I don't
want to never see her again!"
Hitomi: That line doesn’t parse
well.
Kasumi:<Servbot #40> Wait… What the hell did I mean by that?
>Megaman rubbed the back of his neck, thoughtfully, "Neither do
I."
>
>All eyes seemed to slowly turn directly to Megaman after he made his
comment. His eyes darted around, confusedly, "Um... what... did I
say?"
Ayane and Leifang:<Teisel
and Aurin> Neither do I.
Kasumi:<Megaman> Oh, right! Thanks.
>Teisel dropped Aurin onto his feet, "All right. If you want to stay,
that's fine. Be my guest. Less room for us anyway."
Teisel growled as he headed towards the >cargo bay.
>Rolling his eyes, Esling sat at the table again, "Well, you two scurry
off and get this task overwith. Good luck! You're gonna need it."
Leifang: Hugh Jackman *IS* Van
Elsing!
>Megaman rolled his eyes and followed Teisel. This was going to be it.
Finally, they'd get Tron back. He was just hoping that bastard Glyde hadn't
harmed her.
Ayane: Hope in one hand, crap in
the other, kid.
>Teisel fiddled with the controls of the cargo ship, muttering to himself,
"I should have taken one of the Servbots to fly this. I'm not used to
flying ships! I'm just used >to ordering OTHERS to fly ships!"
Kasumi: Teisel Bonne: Middle
Manager Extraordinaire!
>He looked back at Megaman, who had buckled himself in, "Hey, Megaman!
Can you fly this thing?"
>
>"I don't fly." Megaman sighed, "I'm just used to Roll flying the Flutter, that's all."
Hitomi: Where is she anyway? She
kinda disappeared at the end of the last chapter.
>Teisel stood, "Well, uh, there's a first time for everything, isn't
there? Have a seat at the wheel."
Leifang: Uh-oh! They’re on a
collision course with wackiness!
Ayane: And possibly the side of a
building.
>Megaman gulped as he eyed the pilot's seat. He had remembered one of the
times he had tried to fly the Flutter. Data had gotten in his way and he nearly
crashed >into the sea. That was nearly a disaster. Standing from his own seat, he made his way up to the pilot's seat and sat
down. It was nerve- racking to say the least. He >could almost see Data's
image dancing in front of him, trying to help him "relax" while
secretly Megaman had a feeling the monkey wanted to kill him.
Hitomi:<Data> Roll, let me be your love monkey!
<Ayane grabs Kasumi’s kodachi.
Instead of drawing it, she just whacks Helena and Hitomi over the head with
it.>
Ayane: Next time I won’t leave the
scabbard on. <hands the kodachi back to Kasumi>
>Megaman slowly started to get the ship off the ground as Teisel sat in the
rear seat, buckling himself back in. The small ship began to lift from the
ground when.
>
>"MEGAMAN!!!" a high-pitched call came from over the comm. Megaman
jumped and lost control of the ship as it slammed into the wall.
>
>"HEY!" Teisel yelled, "WATCH WHERE YOU'RE FLYING THIS
SHIP!"
Leifang:<Megaman> I am! I’m flying it into a wall!
Ayane: I see Megaman is a graduate
of the
Kasumi: This is why Roll drives
most of the time.
>"Who is this!?" Megaman yelled into the comm.
>
>An ever-annoying monkey voice came onto the comm,
"Megaman, this is Data! I just wanted to wish you good luck! Ki-ki!"
Leifang:<Data> And I figure that take-off was the best time
to do so. Ki-ki!
>Before Megaman could have a chance to curse out the monkey, the comm went
dead.
>
>"Is that monkey trying to get us KILLED?" Teisel exclaimed.
>
>"I think so." Megaman sighed, shaking his head, "All
right... here we go."
All: CRASH!!
>As Megaman tried again, the ship blasted forward... and hit the door.
Megaman and Teisel were both jostled about a bit.
>
>"WHAT are you DOING up there??" Teisel was waving a fist at
Megaman.
>
>"If you'd like to try and take over in the flying, be
my guest!" Megaman retorted, "I'm doing as best I can! These are
totally unfamiliar controls!"
Hitomi: No… Really…
Why didn’t they just bring Roll?
>"Just WATCH OUT FOR THE DOORS!"
All: And WATCH OUT FOR SNAKES!!
Ayane: In the future, ship pilots
fear attacks by Jim Morrison more than anything else.
>Megaman shook his head. He was sick of hearing Teisel's voice already. That
didn't take long. As he tried to forget about Teisel and concentrate on Tron,
he >wiped away sweat and went to work again. This time, he managed to get
under the doors and out of the warehouse. In less than a minute, the SigmaCorp
cargo >ship was out of
<All hum travelogue music>
Leifang: If you lived here, you’d
be trapped in a crappy fanfic by now.
>"Let's go! I want everybody out of sight!" Glyde was shouting
orders to the little number of Birdbots and the employees of SigmaCorp,
"If Teisel and that kid are >coming here, I want this to be executed
perfectly! We might get a chance to get three hostages!"
Kasumi: So… who would be left to
pay the ransom then? Bon? The
servbots?
>One of the Birdbots inclined its head to Tron, "What about her?"
>
>Glyde shook his head, "Leave her! We'll use her as bait to lure them
in."
>"Yes, sir."
>
>Tron looked about. There had to be something that she could use to help her
escape. Unfortunately, there was nothing in reach. There was a few knives,
firearms, >the usual for an arms manufacturing company... even if it was one
of the many dummy companies for the Loath Corporation. But, something caught
her eye that >made her smile, despite the gag. She knew, as soon as she saw
it, that she would have some use of it soon. She smiled again as she read the
label on the wooden >crate: XG3 Rocket Launcher.
Leifang:<Tron> Sweet… Time to make like
Claire Redfield.
Ayane: …the HELL?! Are they
holding her prisoner in a freakin’ WEAPONS LOCKER?!!
Kasumi:<Glyde> I dunno… Just stick her in any random room.
Kasumi:<Glyde> Yeah. Sure. Whatever.
>"So, Megaman..." Teisel said suddenly, trying to strike up
conversation. The two had been silent since the last time Teisel had screamed
at Megaman for hitting the >doors.
>
>"What is it, Teisel?" Megaman responded.
Leifang:<Teisel> How about them Mets?
>"Is it true?" Teisel asked, a bit of slyness in his voice.
>
>"Is what true?"
>
>"Do you like my sister?"
Hitomi: WHAT?! You’re in the
middle of a FREAKIN’ RESCUE MISSION!! SAVE THE LOCKER ROOM CRAP FOR LATER!
>Megaman's face turned red. He licked his lips slightly. These were two of
the subjects he didn't enjoy getting into: Tron and love. He couldn't deny it.
Kasumi:<Megaman, wailing> I *did* have sexual relations with
that woman!
>"Y-yes." he said, stuttering lightly.
>
>Teisel was silent for a moment and then started laughing those maniacal
laughs that he seemed to do quite often, "I can't believe it! I knew she
liked you but-"
>
>"What???" Megaman looked back, "Sh-she does?"
>"You didn't pick up on it?" Teisel asked, "I thought she
made it obvious."
Leifang:<Megaman> I’m a video game hero, you moron! Romantic
ineptitude is part of my contract!
>"No, not real-" Megaman began. Suddenly, a beeping on the panel
drew his attention towards the problem.
>
>"What's going on?" Teisel asked.
Kasumi:<Megaman> This thing is beeping.
Ayane:<Teisel> What does that mean?
Kasumi:<Megaman> I have no idea.
>"We're getting a signal." Megaman said, quirking an eyebrow,
"Patching it through."
>
>"Teisel, this is Esling. You read me?" Aurin's voice piped up.
>"Yes, Aurin, we hear you. Go ahead." Teisel replied, a hint of
annoyance in his voice.
>
>"Hey, listen up, Megaman's girl is powering up their ship. She's
probably going to be coming to pick M&M up after you nab Tron. I'll be with
her." Aurin >explained.
>
>"M&M?" Megaman glared at the comm.
Leifang: He’s comparing him to a
candy *rapper*! Ha!
<Ayane smacks her upside the
head.>
Kasumi: At least it wasn’t M2M.
Ayane: One more line and I rip off
your arms, opera girl.
>"Hmmm... all right but don't either of you
get in our way!" Teisel growled, "If she dies-"
>
>"I'll be better off." Replied Aurin's voice with a snap,
"Just remember, Teisel, the only reason I’m on this mission is because I’m
paid to be as such. We clear on >that? See ya."
Hitomi:<Aurin> Wouldn’t wanna be ya!
>Teisel practically used every curse he could think of and then some against
Aurin, who had already left the comm.
Leifang: So who were the other
curses against?
>"Teisel, you can't let that guy get to you." Megaman sighed.
>
>"Why did I ever hire him anyway??" Teisel muttered under
his breath, "You don't know Aurin like I do. He'd turn on you for 100
Zenny! He's also had an >aversion to Tron from the first time he saw
her."
>
>“Why?”
Kasumi:<Teisel> Probably the fact that she was drilling
rounds into him with a gattling gun at the time.
Kasumi:<Teisel> He got better.
>“How should I know?” Teisel shrugged, with a frown,
“I told you that he was loopy.”
>
>"Odd." Megaman replied, "Against Tron but willing to
work for her? Doesn’t make sense..."
Ayane: So to recap, Tron’s dolt
brother has teemed up with an apparently lobotomized Megaman to save Tron using
plans provided by a treacherous twit who hates them.
>"Either way, he's not our concern now, is he?"
Hitomi: Actually, he kinda *is*
>"No... hold on." Megaman said, looking
ahead, noticing finally that they were already flying above
Leifang: The skyscraper looked
like a city?
>"Unnerving, to say the very least." Teisel said, rubbing his
forehead.
>
>"We're coming up on SigmaCorp." Megaman announced, "I'll prepare
to dock."
Leifang:<Teisel> Prepare! Prepare! You’re always preparing!
Just go!
>Teisel nodded, punching keys on a nearby console, "Right, then. Should
we ask permission or just barge on in?"
>
>"I think we can forego the usual formalities." Megaman answered
with a grin, "What kind of weapons do we have?"
Kasumi: They went top all that
trouble to get a disguised ship and they’re just going to start blowing stuff
up? That doesn’t seem very stealthy.
>"Well, you have that buster gun of yours." Teisel indicated the
weapon, "But I've had to use this."
>
>Teisel pulled a pistol out of his pocket but it was modified greatly,
"Tron created this. She calls it the Corona Gem. Since we couldn't sneak
on one of our robots, >I'll use this."
Ayane:
Leifang: Yup. One shot and you
suddenly appear on the beach with an urge to skip your pager across the water.
>"Good idea." Megaman nodded, "All
right. Prepare for disembarking."
>
>Megaman looked forward, the entire skyline of
Hitomi:<Megaman> You don’t think this could be a *trap*, do
you?
Kasumi:<Teisel> Nah…
>"No contact yet." Megaman rubbed his
chin, "Strange, indeed."
>
>A little bump told the two-man crew that the ship had finally landed onto
the SigmaCorp building.
>"No guards?" Megaman quirked an eyebrow,
"Now, I have a really bad feeling about this."
>
>"In any case... we're in!" Teisel exclaimed, practically tearing
the belts from his figure. He clenched his hand into his fist and thrust it
into the air, "Lets... DO IT!"
Leifang:<Megaman> I don’t swing that way, Teisel.
>Megaman blinked, "...ok."
>
>"Hey, you can do your catch phrase, I can do mine." Teisel said,
defiantly.
Ayane:<Megaman> I don’t have a catchphrase in this series,
you knob.
>"99 pieces of 'bots on the wall, 99 pieces of
'booooots." Tron was singing in her lonely boredom. Her captors
were gone and she was already working on a way >out.
Hitomi: By singing?
Leifang: Hey! She didn’t say it
was a *good* plan.
>"I'll take one down and smash Glyde's face in." she smiled
sadistically, "98 pieces of 'bots on the wall."
Kasumi: That doesn’t rhyme.
Ayane: Well, at least she’s sort
of in character now.
>"What's that?" Teisel asked as the two slinked against the walls.
They had decided to take Aurin's advice and get to level 55. No contacts, no
encounters, no >nothing. They were on the 55th floor, which really didn't
take too much time from the roof. The elevator was quick and no one had stopped
them along the way. >This was a major concern of theirs, to say the very
least.
>Now, they were looking into a
large, dark room.
>
>"What's what?" Megaman replied.
>
>"90 pieces of 'bots on the wall, 90 pieces of 'booooots... I'll take
one down and smash Glyde's face in again, 89 pieces of 'bots on the wall."
Hitomi: I think she’s starting to
lose it.
Ayane:<Tron> We hates them, yes, we does, precious… Wicked,
tricksy, false…
>"Is that... Tron?" Teisel widened his
eyes, "TRON???"
>
>A voice from the darkness called back, "Teisel?? Is that you?"
>Teisel ran in quickly, "Yeah, it's me, sis! Hold on! We'll get you out
of here before you can say-"
>
>"One more step and the girl dies!"
Kasumi:<Teisel> Well, that’s not the phrase I would have
chosen, but what the hell.
>Another voice pierced the
darkness like a rose thorn. The lights around Tron flashed on and Glyde stood
there, holding his own Corona Gem, the he had stolen >off of Tron, at Tron's
head, whom was surprised as well.
Leifang:<Tron> Holy crap! You were standing there the whole
time?!
>"Glyde." Megaman growled.
>
>"So, the little brat is here as well." Glyde sneered at Megaman,
"Well, Tron, be glad that the last thing you see will be him.
Goodbye."
>
>Megaman didn't have much time to think. He snapped up his buster and
blasted Glyde back before he could pull the trigger. Glyde tumbled backwards a
bit. As >Megaman ran over to deal with him, Teisel began to untie Tron.
Ayane: Well, guess that means he’s
all right then.
>Once she was out of the ropes, Tron hugged Teisel tightly, "Teisel, thank
you so much! But, how'd you get past the traitor?"
>
>"Traitor?"
Kasumi:<Tron> You know… The traitor.
Leifang:<Teisel> Does this traitor have a name?
Kasumi:<Tron> You know… The one character
with the things.
>"Flutter, this is Teisel. Bring yourselves in, Aurin!" Megaman
spoke into the comm as Glyde got up for his second wind.
Ayane: Megaman’s having an
identity crisis I see.
>"Damn you." Glyde growled at him,
"I can see why Teisel was so frustrated with you. You're a true annoyance,
boy."
>With that, he quickly shot at Megaman, who retaliated with another shot.
This time it hit him... erm... below the equator, if you catch my drift.
All: KOMEDY!!
>Glyde's eyes were as wide as saucers, groaning in pain. Megaman laughed,
"Well, I guess now, I'm a real pain in the-"
Leifang:<Megaman> …NOSE!!
Ayane:<Tron> Uhhh… Try again, bright eyes.
>"Hey, Glyde!" Tron's voice echoed. Glyde
looked up to be staring at the long barrel of a XG3 Rocket Launcher.
Hitomi:<Glyde> I knew I shouldn’t have left that just lying
around.
>Tron glared at him, "Sayonara, Glyde." With those words, she
launched a rocket straight at Glyde, who was too much in shock to move
anywhere. The rocket >caught him straight in the stomach and kept on going,
taking Glyde with it.
Kasumi: Instead of, say, exploding
like a normal rocket would?
>Glyde wasn't going to enjoy this ride. His arms were waving about
frantically, trying to stop himself and the rocket but to no avail. The rocket
and Glyde both >smashed through the window and kept going and going until
they both crashed into a nearby skyscraper and exploded in brilliant flames.
With Glyde out of the >way, Tron dropped the rocket launcher onto the floor.
Ayane: Tron Wins…. FATALITY!!
>"Tron." Megaman said, coming up to her
slowly, "Are you... alright?"
>
>"Of course I am!" she declared, brightly, "You... came for
me. I guess... I... owe you one." She stared up at him, then quickly
grabbed him in a tight hug, sobbing >softly against him, “Th-thank you...
thank you, Megaman...”
Leifang:<Teisel> Oh, so I guess I don’t count, huh?
>"TRON!" a voice yelled out. The three celebrators turned to see
Aurin standing in the darkened doorway. He took a few steps forward, grinning,
"Well, I'm glad >to see that you've been safely rescued."
>
>"Aurin." Tron wiped her eyes as they turned to slits,
"What're YOU doing here?"
>
>"Oh, not much. I'm just playing my small part in your rescue by
actually making it possible for these two nimrods to actually rescue you."
He replied, sarcastically.
Kasumi: Very, very small.
>"Well, my thanks to you." She said, turning
away. Aurin frowned. He had expected a bit more than that... although this
wasn't exactly untypical of Tron Bonne, >being who she was. But, he noticed
something... there was something red in her beautiful jet-black hair.
Leifang:<Arche Klane> I have lovely everything!
>He didn't think much of it.
But, then, it moved. It moved from her head towards her back, a small stream of
red light, nearly invisible, following it. As soon as he >heard the click of
a gun's hammer, Aurin knew.
Hitomi: Tron was actually Sarah
Conner and the Terminator had found her.
Ayane: See, this is why laser
sights suck in crowded rooms.
>"TRON! GET DOWN!" he screamed as he
lunged forward, knocking the female pirate hard into Megaman –
Kasumi: That seems to be happening
to him a lot lately.
Leifang<Megaman> Thank you,
Ian Jenkins! You’ve made my life worth living again!
>just as several shots rang
out, all catching the young man in the back. Aurin cried out, stunned. The
world suddenly went hazy about him. He saw Tron turn >around, looking at him
with widened eyes. Her lips moved, calling his name. However, he could hear
nothing as he fell to his knees and then completely to the >ground,
unmoving.
Ayane: Looks like Rolly Vincent
took him out.
Hitomi: You mean Rally Vincent
right?
Ayane: Trust me on this one.
>Teisel quickly knelt down quickly beside him, “Aurin... Aurin, wake up!!!”
>
>Megaman brought his buster gun to bear at the trail of smoky-red light,
"Whoever you are, show yourself!"
Kasumi:<Megaman> And turn off that damn dry ice fog machine!
>Tron looked up at Megaman then toward the direction of his buster,
"That's her! That's the traitor!"
>
>Megaman blinked down at Tron, "Traitor? What traitor?"
Leifang:<Tron> The traitor! The one I mentioned earlier!
>"Glyde told me that someone informed him of your plan. This is
it!"
Hitomi: This is the plan? It’s
even dumber than I thought
>"Who was it?"
>
>"It was-"
>
>"Me... I'm afraid." a very familiar voice said as its owner
stepped out of the darkness, her blond hair swaying a bit from the open window
and her green eyes >nearly in tears.
Ayane:<Roll> And I would have gotten away with it too if it
wasn’t for you meddling kids!
>Megaman's mouth went dry and his buster shook as his quaking voice uttered
a name, "...Roll?"
Kasumi: Cue dramatic music. Go to
close-up. Aaaaannndd fade to commercial.
>(Megaman, Roll, the Bonnes, etc., are all property of
Capcom. They aren't my characters. Don't sue me. I probably made any people
you’ve never heard of >before. Enjoy.)
>
>Megaman Legends Trilogy
Leifang: Or at least is *was*
until they made Megaman Legends: Resurrection and screwed the whole thing up.
>Episode Three: Unexpected Betrayal
>By Ian Jenkins
>
>Email: Kronosreckeryahoo.com
>
>Roll stepped into the light, her pistol still drawn and aimed at Tron.
Megaman was breathless. He couldn't believe what he was seeing.
Kasumi:<Megaman> Who the hell does she think she is?
Virginia Maxwell?
Ayane: Not with that marksmanship.
>He couldn't believe Roll would
do such a thing. And Aurin... he had saved Tron even after he said he'd be better
off without her.
Hitomi: I guess she’s sort of a
Roll/Tron hybrid now.
Ayane: Princess Devilotte?
>He slowly turned his head to Teisel, still kneeling beside Aurin’s inert
body, "Teisel... how's Aurin?"
>
>The air pirate's face was grim, "...he’s
dead."
>Roll swallowed hard, "I didn't mean to kill him." Her expression,
suddenly, turned to that of hatred, "Tron, on the other hand."
>
>"Roll, why?" Megaman asked quietly, "Why'd you do it?"
Kasumi:<Roll> I did it for the money.
Ayane:<Roll> I did it for the kicks.
Leifang:<Roll> I did it because that damn bitch got her own
game! I’ve been around longer than her, dammit!! I’m due!!
>"Don't you get it, Megaman?" Data's voice chimed in as the little
monkey hopped in, "The Bonnes have been double-crossing you since you met
them... though >they've helped you before, all they care about is their own
financial gain!"
Hitomi: Actually they’ve been
trying to kill him since they met. The double-crossing came later.
>"I couldn't just stand by while Glyde would try to kill Tron!"
Megaman said, angrily, "This time, THEY were the ones who needed help! I
thought it only fair!"
Ayane: Ummm… I’m not sure I get that
logic, but I’ll just roll with it… No pun intended.
>"Because you love Tron, right?" Data
screamed.
>
>All in the room fell dead silent. Megaman's mouth was hung open as was
Tron's and Roll's.
Kasumi: Oh *GOOD ONE*, Data!
Hitomi:<Megaman> Remind me to kill you later, Data.
Leifang:<Data> Yes, sir.
>"You LOVE her???" Roll asked, incredulous, "After all she's
put us through, after all the lies, after all the times she's tried to kill
you... you... love her?"
Leifang:<Megaman> What can I say? I’m a kinky bastard!
>"I..." Megaman began. He looked from Tron to Roll and knew he
couldn't deny what he'd been hiding.
>That was all he got through before both Roll and Tron were practically
nose- to-nose and right in front of his face. He gulped slightly.
>
>"Just like you to try and get him over to your side!" Roll glared
at Tron.
>
>"I never knew he did!" Tron retorted with a glare of her own.
Hitomi: I smell a cat fight in the
air.
Ayane: This Betty and Veronica
shtick is getting out of hand.
>"Yeah, right! That's why you tried to get him
away from me! You little bitch!"
>
>With that, Tron slapped Roll across her face, HARD, making the gun drop out
of her hand. Roll staggered back, a red glove mark on her cheek. All were quiet
>for a few moments.
Leifang:<Tron> Yeah, bitch.
Ayane:<announcer> Round one…. FIGHT!!
>"YAAAAAHHHH!" Roll screamed tackling Tron
to the ground and responding with a few slaps of her own along with some
punches.
>
>"Tron! Roll! Stop this!" Megaman yelled, trying to break
them up.
Hitomi: Am I the only one who
thinks that the whole fanfic was a buildup for this one scene?
Kasumi: Nope.
>Teisel was also trying, "Tron, get her off you! That doesn't look
quite... right."
Leifang: I guess that depends on
your point of view.
Ayane: …no comment.
>"You two are wasting your time." Data waddled over, "They're
going to beat the living stuffing out of each other."
>Teisel's face went grim, "There's only one thing we can do."
>
>"What's that?" Megaman asked, quirking an eyebrow.
Kasumi:<Teisel> Smack you until you quit that eyebrow crap.
Leifang:<Megaman> It’s a nervous tic, okay?
>A grin formed on Teisel's face, "Gamble. I'll put 40,000 Zenny on
Tron."
>
>"You're going to bet on who's going to win???" Data jumped into
the air, angrily doing his little dance.
Ayane:<Teisel> He’s right.
Hitomi:<Megaman> Yeah. Let’s blow up a robot monkey instead.
It’s more productive.
>"Why not?" Megaman shrugged, "All
right. I'll put 40,000 on Roll, since you've already bet on Tron."
>
>"I'll bet both your 40,000 Zenny bets if they BOTH lose!" Data
exclaimed excitedly.
Ayane: And I’ll bet forty grand
that someone gets slammed with a folding chair before this thing is over.
>The two of them looked to Data with a weird look but then continued to
watch the cat fight that was evolving.
Leifang: Insert standard Pokemon
joke here.
>Tron managed to kick Roll off her, taking her down. She jumped to her feet
and started to grab the rocket launcher. Roll quickly grabbed hold of Tron's
foot and >tripped her up. Tron cursed as she hit the floor with a thud.
Teisel and Megaman watched eagerly, cheering on their respective meal tickets.
Kasumi: …the callous bastards.
>"You're gonna regret ever becoming Megaman's girl." Tron growled
as she sent her foot into Roll's face. Roll recoiled back, holding her face in
pain. She was a >better builder than a fighter, whereas, Tron was excellent
at both.
Hitomi: Huh?
Hitomi: Yeah. But that Roll was
the cutesy Original Recipe version. This is an entirely different Roll.
Ayane: Look… She’s a freaking
pirate, okay? She blows stuff up for a living. Just deal with it.
>Getting to her feet, Tron snickered down at Roll, who was slowly rising,
"You're so pitiful." She smacked Roll again, "You should have
stayed in the garage!"
>
>Roll was angry, big time, with tear streaks down her face. She wasn't about
to let some two-bit pirate take her down!
Kasumi:<Ruby Heart> Hey! That’s not nice.
>"SHUT UP!" she yelled, slamming a punch square into Tron's face.
Teisel, Megaman, and Data all cringed. That was a nasty shot. Tron flew
backwards to the >ground, stunned.
Leifang: Hey! Vs. game physics!
>Roll rubbed her knuckles. That hurt. Tron had a hard head, as it proved
earlier, in her own humble opinion. Tron, bloody lip and all, slowly stood to
face Roll, on >the point of going homicidal, "That's it... no more Miss
Nice Pirate! I've had it with you!"
>
>With renewed strength from somewhere, Tron hurled herself at Roll, kicking,
punching, biting, as Roll was fighting back the same way.
Leifang:<CardCaptor Schlueter> Daaaaaaaaaaammmmnnnnn…
Hitomi: Not since Sakura Kasugano
and Karin Kanzuki fought in the rain has Capcom delivered such a fanboy
inspired battle!
Kasumi: I was wondering why Tecmo
bought me that schoolgirl uniform.
Ayane: They got you one too, huh?
Kasumi: Yeah. And they told me to
be sure to use lots of kicks while wearing it. I’m not sure why.
Ayane: I’ll explain later, sis.
>"Ooh." Megaman winced, "This is getting bloodier than I
thought it would."
Leifang: Well, Capcom has been
trying to play up the blood and guts angle since Resident Evil was a success, I
guess.
Kasumi: And then we made a killing
on a volleyball game and made them look really dumb for wasting all that time
on building the better zombie.
>The two girls tussled about on
the ground, practically turning a mere catfight into an all-out brawl. Roll
aimed and kicked the pirate three times into her stomach. >Tron fell back,
clutching her stomach as if it were bleeding.
><No! > She thought, <I'm not going to be beaten by this girl! >
>
><She's down for the count! > Roll thought, <She's weaker than she
lets on. >
>
><Tron or Roll? > Megaman was also thinking, trying to decide,
<Both are good-looking... and... I love both. But...
Roll, I love more like... a sister.>
Leifang:<Megaman> But you know what they say, incest is the
best! Put your sister--<WHACK!> OW!!
Ayane: Knock it off, Kozue Kaoru.
><That little blonde isn't that bad looking.> Teisel mused, <Her
name's Roll? Heh... I think I'm going to learn as much as I can about her.>
<All stare blankly>
All: EWWWWWWWWWW…
><I'm hungry! > Data’s
mind whined, <Ee-eek! >
Hitomi: How can he be hungry? He’s
a flippin’ *robot*!
>Tron's eyes scanned the nearby ground, trying to find something that could
be of use. She groaned as her stomach started gurgling again. She would pay
that >blonde bitch back for that. Suddenly, her eyes shone as she saw
something lying under a junk pile. She reached over to retrieve the hammer and
got to her feet.
Kasumi:<Tron> It’s HAMMER TIME!
>Roll, before that, had grabbed the metal folding chair that Tron had been
previously tied precariously to. She folded it back up so that she could carry
in easily and >waited and watched.
Ayane: Hey! Can I call them or
what?
>Tron had moved a little bit to
a junk pile and pulled something out. Roll quirked an eyebrow, frowning.
Leifang:<Roll> I learned that from Megaman. Did that look
right?
>"Tron?" She asked, "What's
that?"
>
>"You'll see." Tron smirked and turned to slam the hammer into
Roll's skull. She did so but not before Roll's metal chair slammed into her
face. The two stood there >for a few moments, stunned as their weapons were
at each other's heads. Then, simultaneously, the two fell back, twitching
slightly. But they didn't get up.
>"Aww." Megaman and Teisel groaned as
Data jumped for joy, "80,000 Zenny! I win! Whoo-hoo! Ee-eek!"
Kasumi: Never mind that Roll and
Tron are both dying of brain hemorrhages as we speak.
>"Stop holding me back, Teisel!" Tron squirmed in her brother's
grip, "Let me kick her ass!"
All: GAH!!
Kasumi: Wow… Either she recovers
fast or we missed a jump cut.
>Teisel shook his head, "Oh, no. Both of you have done enough fighting
today. Besides, I'm not going to lose any more money in a lost gamble."
>
>"That explains why Data's jumping around." Roll scratched her
head, not even wanting to go back into another fight.
Ayane: Hello? Someone get a
doctor? Head injuries, anybody? Hello?
>Megaman stood in the middle, between Tron and Roll, as to stop Tron from
getting her hands on Roll, "Look, you two... it was real sweet of you two
to fight over >me and nearly kill each other in the process." he said,
rubbing his neck, "But, you two have to understand that I love both of
you!"
>
>"WHAT?" came the response from the two
ex-combatants.
Hitomi: Roll and Tron looked at
each other briefly, then nodded and proceeded to beat the living daylights out
of Megaman.
>"Yeah." Megaman sighed. He turned to
Roll, "Roll... I've known you all my life. We've been together for our
entire lifetime. That's why I love you as a sister... as >we were brought up
to be like, y'know?"
Kasumi:<Megaman> Kind of like Alex and Luna… Okay, bad
example.
Leifang: Of course, at one point
she *was* his sister, but that was another universe entirely, so let’s skip
that.
>Roll was quiet. She knew he was right but she just couldn't say anything at
this point. She merely looked at the ground, taking a sudden interest in her
shoes.
Hitomi:<Roll> These are so adorable. I got them half off,
you know.
>"I've heard enough." Tron sighed, turning away, "Megaman,
thanks for rescuing me but I don't see how something like this can work
out."
Leifang:<Megaman> Really…? Oh… Say, Roll, about what I said a
minute ago.
Leifang:<Megaman> Crap…
>Megaman glanced over at Tron, who was still ranting, "The next time we
meet each other, you really should know that I'm not going to hold back if you
get in our >way! You understand what I'm saying?"
Hitomi:<Chris Tucker> DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THAT ARE
COMING OUT OF MY MOUTH?
>Megaman grabbed her arm to turn her towards him, "Tron... shut
up." With those words, he planted a kiss directly onto her lips. Tron was
taken by surprise but >couldn't bring herself to break away from his kiss.
This had been something she had been dreaming about since she had met him. Now,
it was finally a reality! She >moved into his embrace and threw her arms
around his neck as she kissed back, passionately. The rest just stood and
watched until Teisel spoke up again.
Kasumi:<Teisel> YOU SICK BASTARD! LET GO OF MY SISTER!!
>"Uh, guys... we, uh, seem to be attracting attention from some
reporters." he said, a hint of panic in his voice as he looked outside to
the airship fluttering outside, a >cameraman's video camera rolling. Voices
from down the corridor seemed to be getting closer and closer, "We have to
get out before we arouse suspicion!" The >two ignored him and continued
with their passionate kissing.
Ayane: Real sensitive, Megaman.
You just broke Roll’s heart and now you immediately start necking with another
girl, ya big tool!
>"They've been lip-locked for almost two minutes!" Data was
jumping up and down, "They have to breathe SOMETIME!"
>
>Something beeped in Tron's pocket and she cursed herself silently. She
broke away from the kiss for a second to retrieve her comm, "What is
it!?"
Leifang: So, reporters don’t get
Tron’s attention, but her pager does.
>"Babu-babu! Baaaabuuuuu."
Bon's voice came on over the comm.
>
>Tron's face went pale and she was angry, "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE
WATCHING ME ON TV??"
Kasumi: Smile, Tron! You’re on
Candid Camera!
>"Uh, Tron." Teisel gestured to a small
TV set at the back of the room, showing Tron kissing Megaman... or vice versa.
Ayane: Who’s kissing who? You
viewers at home figure it out. I don’t give a damn.
>"Absolute chaos here on
All: GROUP HUG!!
Hitomi: Oh, now they’re even
*posing* for the cameras
>Tron and Megaman's faces both turned red in embarrassment. This was too
much. But, the worst was yet to come.
Leifang: The fanfic had been
slated for a sequel.
All:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
>The voices and their owners suddenly burst into the room. All eyes went
wide. It was what they had hoped to avoid: newspaper reporters.
>
>"Megaman! Megaman! Jim Reinquest, Kattelox Times. How long have
the two of you been together?" one reporter asked.
>"Uh, well, I." Megaman began.
>
>"Gerald Calhoun, Ryship Press. Is it true that the two of you
have been bitter enemies? Does it bother you at all that you're dating someone
with no sense of >morality or good taste in clothes?"
Ayane: Ouch…
Leifang: Obviously, this guy’s
never seen any of Tina’s outfits.
>"HEY!" Tron yelled, angry. Teisel, Roll,
and Data all stood back, watching the scene unfold before them, amused.
>
>"Should we give them our input?" Roll giggled.
Kasumi: She’s taking being dumped
very well.
>"Nah." Teisel grinned, "I think
they can handle it."
>
>"Ki-ki!"
Hitomi: It’s nice of them to be so
lighthearted, what with Aurin’s body still lying there in the hallway with six
bullets in him.
>The hounding reporters never stopped, "Frank Dellis, Calinca Star.
Have the two of you ever had sex?"
>
>"WHAT?" came the replies of the two questioned.
Leifang: The future of news
reporting shaped by Paris Hilton, ladies and gentlemen.
>"Just being thorough!" Dellis replied, backing away.
>
>"That's it! I've had enough of these questions!" Megaman said
angrily, "No comment! No comment! Get out!"
Kasumi:<Megaman> Can’t we just flee the scene of a crime in
peace already?!
>As Megaman prodded the reporters out with his buster, Tron flushed red,
"Megaman... I."
>
>He grinned at her after closing the door, "Don't worry about them...
say, Tron, do you think... maybe... we could go out on a date sometime?"
>Tron blinked, "A date? Where would we go?"
>
>"Oh, I don't know." Megaman tapped his chin, thinking, "Oh,
say...
Leifang:<Megaman> And there’s this really nice hotel there…
Hitomi:<Teisel> HEY!!
>Tron blushed and rubbed her cheek, "I'm... not sure."
>
>Megaman, seemingly the charmer, bent her back and planted another kiss,
this time, deeper, "Mmmm... how about now?"
>
>Tron opened her eyes slightly, "Yes... how's Saturday?"
Ayane: INTENSE… DATE SETTING…
ACTION!!
Kasumi:<Roll> Ummm… Shouldn’t we be going? I think the cops
are coming.
>"Fine with me." Megaman smiled as he
kissed her again.
>
>"What a scoop!" a voice cried and several cameras flashed.
Megaman and Tron broke off to see several reporters from their airships,
snapping pictures. >Megaman fought the urge to take down each and every one
of those ships. He glanced back at Tron, "I'll pick you up at 8?"
>
>"Sounds fine." She replied, "I think we'd better
leave so we don't attract anymore attention to ourselves?"
Leifang: Of course, you just let
them know where and when you’re meeting again.
Kasumi:<Ruri Hoshino> These people are idiots.
>"Good idea."
>
>With that, the lot of them headed up for the landing pad to their
respective ships and took off, to get away from the flying paparazzi.
Hitomi: Flying paparazzi? Sounds
like a circus act.
>TWO DAYS LATER
Kasumi:<Gary Shandling> Okay, two days just past…
>"Well, look on the bright side,
Megaman." Roll said, cheerfully as Megaman gaped at the paper onboard the
Flutter, "You're back in the headlines again!"
>
>"I didn't MEAN I wanted to be in the papers like this!" Megaman
cried, "Look at this headline: FAMOUS DIGGER SUCKS FACE WITH INFAMOUS
>PIRATE CHICK!"
Hitomi:<newspaper> JIMMY LIKES SALLY! WILL HE ASK HER TO THE
PROM? DUUUUUUUUDE!!
>"The price of forbidden love, Megaman."
Roll smiled, "Eternal disgrace."
>
>"Tell me about it." Megaman sighed, "Let's see: DIGGER HERO
SECRET PIRATE LOVER? What the hell! These guys are bending the truth
completely!"
Leifang: Yeah! He’s not keeping it
a secret at all!
Ayane: I see even in the future
the New York Times still uses the same headline writer.
>"Hmmm." Roll mused, reading another
headline aloud, "This one must be for the supermarket tabloids only:
MEGAMAN VOLNUTT CARRYING PIRATE >BABY!" It was kind of cute, in a
demented way, showing Megaman holding a baby with a pirate hat and eyepatch.
Kasumi: So… Tron got *Megaman*
pregnant?!
<Long pause>
All: Ewwwwwww…
Ayane: It’s official. I’m going to
be sick.
>Megaman snatched the paper away from Roll and nearly ripped it completely
in half, "Whaaaaat? Oh, these people are SICK!"
>
>"Now, now, Megaman. Let these
papers say all they want. We both know the truth." Roll smiled at him,
"Besides, it doesn't damage your reputation as a Digger, >now does
it?"
>"Well... no... but it completely destroys any
opportunity to go out in public without someone asking me questions like
that." Megaman sunk down on the couch, >Data dancing on the table.
All: Ewwwwwww…
Ayane: Someone PLEASE kill him!!
>"Let's see what the news has." Roll said, flipping on the TV.
>
>"Yeah. Let's see what dirt these guys have on me." Megaman
added with on a bitter note.
Hitomi: Hey… Are they still in the
SigmaCorp building? Where the hell is this scene taking place?
>"And in other news today." the news anchorman spoke, "Police
have arrested several members of the SigmaCorp Corporation after it was
revealed that they had >been fronting for an amass
of illegal operations for the black market. As you well know, the owner and CEO
of SigmaCorp, Glyde Loath, was believed killed in >what was labeled a
terrorist attack by the Bonne Family and more surprisingly, the famous digger
known as Megaman Volnutt."
Leifang:<anchorman> President George W. Bush said he would not
rest until the terrorists were stopped, unless it interfered with his golf
game.
>"WHAT?" Megaman stood abruptly.
>
>"Though it is clear that there is a relationship between Volnutt and Tron
Bonne, police are on the lookout for both the Bonnes and Megaman Volnutt to be
brought >in for questioning. When we come back from this commercial break, a
cute story about a three-legged dog who saved a
baby."
Kasumi:<anchorman> And we’ll also have weather, sports and a
new magazine feature to fill some air time.
>Megaman flipped off the television and sat down on the couch, shaking
lightly, "THAT will be what damages my reputation as a Digger."
>
>Roll sat down beside him and hugged him, "We'll get through this...
don't worry, Megaman. I believe in you... I always will."
Hitomi: Ummmm… She does realize he
dumped her, right?
>"They've twisted the story so far!" Tron growled as she read the
headlines of the newspapers, "We need to watch out for the police now! I'm
worried about >Megaman, though... Teisel? TEISEL!
Are you listening to me?"
All: GAAAAHHH!!
Leifang: …the HELL?! Are they in
the same room together?!
>Teisel wasn't listening. He was writing a letter, actually, "Dear Miss
Roll Casket, I've been awestruck by your beauty for some time now and-"
Ayane: We’ve secretly replaced
Teisel Bonne with Racewing. Let’s see who notices.
>"TEISEL!!!!!!" Tron shrieked.
>
>Teisel jumped, dropping the letter, "H-h-huh? What is it, Tron?"
Kasumi:<Tron> It’s a letter, but that’s not important right
now.
>Tron glared at her brother, "Teisel, you bonehead! We have a serious
problem here! We're going to be nailed by the cops sooner or later!"
>
>Teisel chuckled, "Tron, we've dealt with the police before. Besides,
they only want to ask us about what happened at SigmaCorp. Now that they know
that it was >a front for Loath's operations, they will probably believe what
we tell them to believe."
Leifang: Yeah. It’s not like
you’ve done anything *else* they could arrest you for.
>"I worry, though." Tron said, "If they don't believe us,
Megaman will be dragged down with us."
>
>Teisel sighed, "Tron... I know you love him but we can't do anything about
him. At this point in time, we can only worry about ourselves. You know Megaman
is a >resourceful fellow. He can take care of himself."
Ayane:<Tron> Which is more than can be said for you.
>Tron sighed as Teisel put his arm around her, "Don't worry, Tron. Keep
your chin up."
>
>She smiled lightly as she embraced her brother, "Yeah... thanks,
Teisel! C'mon! Let's find ourselves some more money!"
>
>"That's the spirit!" Teisel grinned.
Hitomi: What a wonderful
commitment to piracy they have. Jack Sparrow would be proud.
>Armored fingers drummed a large wooden desk. Their owner stared at the
newspaper in front of him, "So, it's been confirmed. Glyde is dead."
Kasumi: Yeah. Being blown apart by
a rocket will do that.
>"I'm afraid so, sir. It was Tron Bonne's doing." A Birdbot said,
somewhat nervously.
>
>"So I've seen in the news reports. Those two lovebirds would make
excellent servants... don't you agree?"
Leifang:<Birdbot> Ummmm…. No.
Ayane: Anyone who spends a great
deal of their time blowing your stuff up will probably not make a good
employee.
>"Mr. Loath... are you sure?"
>
>Lex Loath chomped on his cigar and laughed, "Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha! Of
course I'm sure! We've both seen what the little missie can do and that Digger
boy knows >how to fight well. I'm sure we both know what assets they can be,
hm?"
Kasumi:<Birdbot> She hates your guts and they both just blew
up a huge chunk of our organization, sir.
>The Birdbot nodded, "Yes, sir. What should I do?"
>
>Loath sat back, the chair creaking under his weight, "We'll let them
be for now. Let's see how this whole situation develops. Then... we'll make our
move. With >those two little powerhouses on our side, there won't be
anything that can stop us from taking over the entire world!"
>The corridors of Loath's ship, the Black Eagle, echoed loudly with the
sound of raucous laughter from inside Loath's quarters.
Hitomi: Because you’re not a
villain without an evil laugh.
Ayane: I seem to get by without
it.
>THE END
Kasumi: …or is it?
Leifang: I hope so.
Ayane: Come on, sis, we have a
match to get to.
<They exit the theater.>
**
THE BEACH
A
few spectators had turned up for the match that afternoon, but generally there
weren’t many people around during the volleyball games on the island except for
a few males who were interested in the players more than the game.
Kasumi
had taken off her sarong and wrapped it around her kodachi before tucking both
under a nearby palm tree along with Ayane’s tank top and shorts. Ayane was off
by the net warming up with a few stretching exercises.
“I
wonder where the other team is,” said Kasumi.
Ayane
scowled and put her hands on her hips. “Really… Whoever they are they’re late,”
she growled.
Just
then Kasumi spotted two figures running towards them. “Oh! Here they are!” she
said.
Two
girls of roughly equal height finally came to a halt. The first had long,
somewhat unruly blond hair and was wearing a dark red bikini and an unusually
large red cap. The other girl had shorter black hair and wore a dark purple
bikini. A group of small robots resembling Lego men were trying to catch up to
them while carrying their equipment.
“Sorry
we’re late,” said the blonde. “I’m Roll Casket and this is my teammate, Tron
Bonne.”
Ayane
twitched.
“Nice
to meet you,” said Kasumi cheerfully.
“Miss
Tron!” called one of the servbots in a high-pitched voice. “Number twenty-five punctured
the volleyball!”
“Did
not!” a second servbot retorted.
“Knock
it off! All of you!” Tron scolded.
“So
who wants to serve first?” asked Roll trying to ignore Tron’s argument with her
robots.
Ayane
twitched again. “I’m going to *kill* that green haired freak…” she grumbled
under her breath.
**
THE REAL END
**
First of all I want to thank fellow MSTer and video game fanboy, Racewing (http://racewing.anifics.com), for reviewing the original draft of this MSTing and whose comments inspired the closing host segment. Also, DOAXcess (http://www.neotaku.com/doax) who provided the names of all the various swimsuits of the DOA girls. I realize that most of my readers don’t pay attention to these little spin-offs of mine, but I hope someone is reading them anyway. Personally, I just do these for fun and to get a break from the usual CCST3K cast.
Until next time,
CardCaptor Schlueter (aka Syaoran-kun)
Season One:
1) The Brain From Planet Arous-A Ranma ½ Fic By Ryoucilo
2) The Mike Rhea Anthology-Ranma ½ Fics By Mike Rhea
(Loves Me, Loves Me Not/ Akane Gets Drained/ Konatsu’s First Kiss)
3) Neon Ranma Evangelion-A Ranma ½ /Neon Genesis Evangelion Fic By Khyron Kingkiller
4) Good Bye Sweet Li (Part 1)-A Card Captor Sakura (CardCaptors) Fic By Lady Yuy
5) Stolen-A Magic Knight Rayearth Fic By hikaru shidou
6) Good Bye Sweet Li (Part 2)-A Card Captor Sakura (CardCaptors) Fic By Lady Yuy
7) The True Power Of Love-A Card Captor Sakura Fic By poshul
8) Marco Polo-A Magic Knight Rayearth Fic By hikaru shidou
9)
10) Is It Reality Or Just A Trick?-A Sailor Moon Fic By Dr. Thinker
Season
Two:
11) The Next Generation-A Card Captor Sakura (CardCaptors) Fic By JimAndZazu
12) Caught In The Act-A Card Captor Sakura (CardCaptors) Fic By Second Sailor Destiny
13) The Shadow Leaders-A Sailor Moon Fic By Dr. Thinker
14) Shinji’s Alter-Ego-A Neon Genesis Evangelion Fic By John82
15) Sailor Jupiter Vs. Godzilla-A Sailor Moon Fic By Flashman (Christian A. Rogers)
16)
17) No Need For CardCaptors-A Tenchi Muyo/Card Captor Sakura (CardCaptors) Fic By Christina Horton
18)
19) Mother, May I [Take Over The World]-A Pokemon Fic By Mallet Boy
20) Syaoran: Romeo… Not Really-A Card Captor Sakura Fic By Golden Eyed Dragon
Season Three:
21) Harry Potter And the Pantie Raiders-A Harry Potter Fic By Ice Blue X
22) The Unforgettable Promise-A Love Hina Fic By KenshinRC
23) To Find My Dad And Have A Family-A Card Captor Sakura Fic By MoshiMoshiQueen
24) Revolutionary Girl Asuka-A Neon Genesis Evangelion/Shoujo Kakumei Utena Fic By Joyce K. Wakabayashi
25) A Dream Come True-A CardCaptor Sakura Fic By Crystalina Rhapsody Draco
26) The Only Constant-A Star Trek: The Next Generation Fic By Stephen Ratliff
27) The Lionel Dark Anthology-Card Captor Sakura(CardCaptors)/Lord Of The Rings Fics By Lionel Dark
(Signs That Say You’re Like Lionel Dark/ More Signs The You’re Like Elle/ The Scythe Carrier)
28) The Ranma ½ Cast Does CCS-A Ranma ½/CardCaptor Sakura Fic By Matthew Cline
29) Megamon X-A Pokemon/Megaman X Fic By Brock Shale
30) Hotaru Goes To Hogwarts-A Sailor Moon/Harry Potter Fic By Saturn Angels
Season Four:
31) The Bubblehead, The Jerk And The High School-A Sailor Moon/Gundam Wing Fic By Jayde Summers
(w/ short True Search-A Shoujo Kakumei Utena Fic By SparkleOfEnergyHeidi)
32) Find You Again-A Vision Of Escaflowne Fic By winged angel
33) The XXX Files-A Shoujo Kakumei Utena Fic By Reanna R. King
34) First Release-A CardCaptor Sakura/Ranma ½ Fic By Wishbringer
35) Bubblegum Card-Ep. 3.1415-A Bubblegum Crisis/X-Men Fic By Kris Overstreet
36) The Black Hole-A Pokemon Fic By Dr. Thinker
37) If You Only Knew-An Angelic Layer Fic By LRPLI Little Rabbit
(w/ short Teaching Aeris-A Final Fantasy VII Fic By Sirius Dogstar)
38) Asuka Vs. Godzilla-A Neon Genesis Evangelion Fic By Austin Covello
Deep Fried SPAM:
1) Why Not Make A Little Money While Surfing The Net
2) Now Offering For Your “Sensitive” Delight… New And Improved!
3) Why RPGs Should Be Severely Censored And Devoid Of Character Development
Specials:
-Christmas Special-Under The Mistletoe/Tsubasa Gets What He Deserves-Ranma ½ Fics By Mike Rhea
-Summaries Of Suffering Vol. 1-A CCST3K Spin-off By Ciircee and Chelle-Sama
-Summaries Of Suffering Vol. 2-A CCST3K Spin-off By Ciircee and Chelle-Sama
-X-01: The Beginning-A Manga Translation By Tonghyun “Vajra” Kim and Edited By Iain Sinclair (MSTed with April Hamilton)
Other MSTings:
Totally Spies Theater 3000:
Season One:
1)
What If Meowth Was
A Girl?-A Pokemon Fic By Dr. Thinker
2)
Sailor Trigger-A Sailor Moon/Chrono Trigger Fic By Sailor Koban
(w/ short BB Hood’s Rampage-A DarkStalkers Fic
By FlamingSmileyFace)
3)
Believe-A Street Fighter Fic By Blackjack Gabianni
4)
The CCST3K Magical MSTery Mini-Series
Collection:
Li Clan Chronicles:
1) Obsession
(Part 1)-A CardCaptor Sakura (CardCaptors) Fic By
Second Sailor Destiny
Dead Or Alive:
Xtreme Fanfic MSTing:
1)
Megaman Legends Trilogy-A Megaman
Legends/Misadventures of Tron Bonne Fic By Ian Jenkins
>"Megaman, can you hear me?" Teisel's voice sounded
with a sigh, "Next time, you might wanna wait AFTER we've put the stairs
up to reach your ship's door."
>
>"Ugh." Megaman slowly opened his eyes, "That
hurt."
Mystery Science Theater 3000
and its related characters and situations
are trademarks of and (c) 2003
by Best Brains, Inc. All rights
reserved.
Keep Circulating The Fanfics....